Dear Esme
by cherrycordial
Summary: On the anniversary of Esme's baby boy's death, Nessie writes her a heartfelt letter to let her know that, while her son might be gone, the rest of her family are always there for her. –– Post-BD, family fluff.


_A/N: Helloooo. So this is just a short little one-shot I came up with after randomly wanting to write a Nessie/Esme story. xD Rated K+ for mentions of death... :P_

_Hope you enjoy! Favorite or leave a review? Would mean a lot to me. :)_

_- Cherry_

* * *

**_Dear Esme_**

—

Today was a sad day. Poignancy hung in the air like the thick scent of rain after it showered. I sat at the mahogany dining room table with my schoolbooks and notes splayed out in front of me, but I wasn't paying any attention to my studies. My gaze was out the glass wall that faced the river, where my grandmother sat on the back porch steps with her chin in her hand. Her caramel-colored curls rippled slightly where the breeze touched them, but other than that she was utterly motionless.

I was worried about her; normally she was never this reclusive. All week she'd been sinking into this pensive, saddened state that had my heart skipping a beat each time I remembered it. Esme was such a loving and gentle person; what could have upset her so much that she resorted to being alone? I hoped no one had hurt her feelings. The thought of that made me bristle on the inside. Esme deserved only the most adoring of affections, but even then it wouldn't compare to her love for us.

Quietly, I slid out of my chair and padded over to where Aunt Rosalie sat on the couch, her immortal eyes watching Esme too. She looked at me as I approached, and offered a tiny smile. "Hey, Ness," she murmured, but her attempt at cheerfulness didn't fool me. "Did you need my help, hon?"

I shook my head, and reached out my hand to touch her face. She leaned in and let me press my fingertips to her cool cheek. I showed her my image of Esme, sitting there on the porch with her hair blowing gently, and asked her silently if she knew what was wrong. Aunt Rose sighed when I drew my hand away, then glanced out the glass before leaning close to whisper into my ear, though I knew it did no good to whisper when surrounded by such sensitive ears, "When she was human, a long time ago, not long after your daddy was changed, she gave birth to her own baby boy who died a few days after he was born. It still makes her sad to remember she hadn't been able to raise him."

My eyes stung with tears and I felt my throat tighten up. I blinked furiously as I tried not to cry in front of my aunt. Poor Esme! I'd never known she'd had a baby. That was a long time ago, just like Aunt Rose had said, but with her loving nature I could tell she had adored her son so much. But I was still confused. Why was she sad all of a sudden, and not before? It quickly dawned on me that today must have been the day when he died, and something twisted in my stomach. While everyone else hadn't known her son, her loss was still affecting them––we were a family, and felt each other's pain if one of us was grieving. I bit my lip and looked at Esme again, knowing she would've heard.

Suddenly the lightbulb flicked on over my head, and inspiration whirled around in my mind so fast I felt a little dizzy. But I ran back over to the table and scrambled into my chair, pulling over my notebook and flipping through it until I found a new page. I sharpened my pencil until it looked perfect, then wrote "Dear Esme" across the top of the page in my very best handwriting. I took the time to think about what I wanted to say, tapping my lower lip with my eraser and staring intently at what I had started off with. I could feel Aunt Alice's and Jacob's curious stares, but I didn't care.

Then the words began to form, as clearly as if I had already written them, in my mind's eye, sprawling across the mental page with flawless clarity. I bent over the page again and wrote slowly, making sure each word was correctly spelled and put into the right context. I heard Aunt Rosalie's quiet footfalls from behind as she approached, leaning over my shoulder inquisitively, but I shifted my curls over that shoulder so no one could see. This was only for Esme––no one else could read it.

"Whatcha writing, Nessie?" Uncle Emmett asked as he walked in. His usually cheerful voice was a little less energetic and a little more quiet today. I simply shook my head, not wanting to say a word so Esme couldn't hear what I was doing. The three vampires and one wolf kept watching me, but they all seemed to know to not ask questions at the moment. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Aunt Rose go stand with Uncle Emmett by the wall, leaning her head on his muscular shoulder. He swung his arm around her and held her close to his side in a timeless gesture of comfort. She smiled.

After a while, I had gotten out the words in my head and onto the paper. I felt triumphant, but in a quiet and thoughtful way. I signed my name with X's and O's to add my love, then read it.

_Dear Esme, _I'd wrote.

_Aunt Rose told me why you are feeling sad, and I'm more than sorry that you lost your son. I'm sure he was a beautiful baby, with your hair and skin and eyes and face. Yes, I bet he looked just like you. I am sure he would have loved you so much, and he probably did too, like all babies love their mothers. He must have loved you too, since nobody can't not love you––you're a very beautiful woman, Esme._

_Carlisle and Daddy and Rosalie and Alice and Emmett and Jasper and Momma and Jacob and me all love you. We appreciate everything you do for us. I'm grateful for all the times you make me eat food because I know you're only doing it so I can be healthy and strong. I'm grateful for all the times you give me an extra hug and kiss before I have to go home. I'm grateful for all the times you help me with my schoolwork and encourage me to keep going even when I feel all frustrated. I am grateful you exist, since this family wouldn't be a family without the heart––that's you. Covens are made of loyalty, but families are made of **love**. You bring that love to our family, and we would not be whole without you._

_And it's okay to feel sad. This letter isn't to stop you from missing your baby. I just wanted to let you __know we all love and care about you, and we are all here for you if you need us._

_Lots of love,_

_Nessie xoxoxoxoxoxo_

My heart brimming with satisfaction, I carefully folded it up and hopped out of my chair. I looked over at Aunt Alice expectantly and asked, grinning gently, "Where can I find an envelope?"

—

I hesitated at the back door, looking down at the snowy white envelope in my hands. I had written Esme's name in sprawling letters across the front, with lots of hearts around it, and I'd let everyone sign their name on the back to prove my point that we all cared about her. I was worried it would make her sadder; maybe I shouldn't have said those things about her son. A voice in the back of my mind kept saying she would appreciate it––another voice was panicking right along with me. Once I managed to calm myself down a bit, I decided to just go with it, that Esme would be pleased with it.

The deep porch was slicked with rainwater and the air was cold. The sky was turning dark as the invisible sun set far off in the distance. I took my time walking out, chewing my lip as I kept fighting with myself. I peered around the corner to find Esme right where she had been all day, with her chin in her other hand this time. She looked up once she noticed my heartbeat; her golden eyes were rimmed in red, and I knew tears would have been on her cheeks if she could still shed them.

"Oh––hello, dear," she said in a quiet voice, unenthusiastic. She noticed the white envelope. I stepped forward slowly and hesitantly handed it to her. She raised her thin eyebrows in surprise at her name written on the front. She looked up at me, lips parted slightly. "This is for me?" she asked.

I smiled and nodded, my heart beating a little harder in anticipation and worry. She gasped softly when she turned it over and saw the names on the back, and she stared at them for a moment before looking at me again; I nodded once more in encouragement, hoping it wasn't upsetting to her.

But by the way she eagerly, but very carefully, opened it up, she didn't seem upset at all. She pulled the letter out gently and set the empty envelope at her side. Her white fingers unfolded the paper sinuously, and I bit my lip as she started to read. Her lovely heart-shaped face was emotional in a half-sad, half-happy sort of way as she read, and she bit her lip too as her eyes tightened at the edges. I looked over my shoulder into the house to see the others gathered close to the glass. Daddy had a funny look on his face––like he was going to cry, too. I looked back at Esme, feeling anxious.

"Oh, Nessie," was all she choked out before crushing me into a hug. She pulled me onto her lap and held me close to her chest, burying her face in my hair as she made tiny squeaking sounds. I hugged her back fiercely, closing my eyes tight as I felt hot tears pool beneath my eyelids. I stroked her hair just like she did when she comforted me; if it helped me feel better, I hoped it would for her.

When she pulled away, her eyes were redder than before, but she was smiling. She cupped my cheek in one hand and made me look at her. "Thank you," she murmured. "You are so good with words….This truly means a lot to me, Nessie. I love you, too." She touched her lips to my forehead.

I sniffed, but was unashamed of the few tears that escaped my eyes. I was so relieved that it hadn't made her sadder; that the love and gratitude shining in her eyes was the opposite of misery. I curled into her chest and hid my face in her neck. She held me for a while in silence. I didn't mind.

**_Fin_**

* * *

_Hope you enjoyed. Gotta love family fluff. xD_

_Favorite or leave a review? xx_

_- Cherry_


End file.
